Old Joe Camel lived about 10 years. In the illustrious decade between 1987 and 1997, the smooth, two-humped hotshot blew smoke rings at hop-scotchers and winked at shy adolescent girls with the candor of sheer marketing genius. Of course, Joey Blowey (as he was affectionately known to all his smoke-toking preschool fans) eventually suffered the same fate all truly great marketing campaigns must: he was swallowed by interest of public-interest and the protectors of puritan values.

Now, after 10 years, I am reminded of those Camel-Kool kids and their bloody peace-mongering parents after reading a story about an 11-year old Hamas TV princess, the second coming of our beloved Shirley Temple. She hasn’t changed much,really. Only this time she’s hiding those springy red curls underneath an equally bouncy, floral-print hijab. Oh, and did I mention, this time she’s got war on her mind?

McClatchy:

Saraa wants to be a doctor. If she can’t, the young star of Hamas television’s best-known children’s show said, she’d be proud to become a martyr. Saraa says little Jewish girls should be forced from their homes in Israel so that Palestinians can return to their land.

“They have to leave,” she said. “This is our country. They kicked us out and stole our happiness. This is a natural result.”

I know, I know. We’ve all heard our tweens talk like that (especially the only children) — part of growing up, really. Hormones or something. They throw their head back and shoot off to high-hell in a blaze of self-confidence that only comes from being surrounded by an audience of succeptible, pre-pubescent tweens. But you catch ‘em. And before their cheeks show the first colors of guitly rouge, they know it. And they shut up. And you spank ‘em or do whatever you have to do to make sure it doesn’t happen again. Bad, Tommy, quit your Jihad-ing and play nice with the other kids. And no TV for 2 weeks!

So what’s the deal here? Did Gaza not get the Surgeon General’s memo? War is bad, mmkay… And sending out those beams of a desperate reality into the world’s best-selling playtoy is about as healthy as having a plushy stuffed camel blow rings of ammonia into every Palestinian child’s face.

Parents? Too busy, huh? Sure, heard that one before. You can’t honestly be telling me that a nation — whose television stars always have a back-up career in terrorism — is actually having trouble finding enough time between eeking out a living and dodging schrapnel to be good, protective parents that shield the messages billowing from their tube? Inconceivable.

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